What is "Cool"?

What is "Cool"?

Maybe I have dated myself just by using the word "cool."  "Cool" isn't cool anymore.  Neither is awesome or rad.  Yet, when I hear the words "dope," "tight," or "fat," those words don't sound very cool to me.  But this very sense of feeling "hip" and "on-top of your game" changes as you grow older.

As a toddler, I didn't have much of a sense of cool.  No real friends at that age, and being cool just meant I didn't poop my pants.  Having a bottle of milk or juice was pretty sweet, and Sesame Street was the best pop culture had to offer me.

As a little boy, I had just figured out how to have friends.  Now cool meant being friendly and coming up with fun imaginary games.  I was most proud of being able to tie my shoes.  And math was cool.  Chances are, Sesame Street was still #1 for me.

Pre-teen is the true beginnings of social cliques.  I was not cool.  I was awkward.  Too smart for my own good, and a total know-it-all.  I was good at soccer.  That made me feel cool.  I loved to write and draw, but for the most part I thought about things no other kid thought about.  My curiosity killed Santa and the Easter Bunny.  Sorry about that.  I had to do it.

Teenage years were a blur and a nightmare.  My awkwardness multiplied tenfold.  To me, cool was having favorite bands to rally behind.  I impressed friends by being good at video games, and just being friendly.  But my nerd side kept me from being anything near popular.  Who needs to be popular when you can be cool in your own way?  I liked the wild shocking bands that scared other people.  Cool was being a creative  individual that stood out from the crowd.

My young-adult life, I continued on this quest to be cool.  I was the coolest person I had ever met.  I dyed my hair green, started recording outlandish music and creating art.  Printed tye-dye tee shirts and had dreams of being the next big rock star.  And at some point in my 20's, I became that rock star.  At least in my head.  I am my own rock star.  I don't have to impress anyone.  All I need is a guitar, an amp and electricity.  Nobody can cheer for me louder than my own inner voices.

And in my 30's, I can hardly even relate to the idea of "cool."  I don't care to impress anyone.  I just want to be myself.  To be honest, respectable and a role-model.  There is a 5 year old boy in my life, and I do my best to make him think I'm cool.  We paint.  We play with Transformers.  We play video games.  We are cool together.  And there is a woman in my life who thinks I'm cool no matter what I do.  And that makes me feel cool.

Maybe being cool is just for young people.  As I grow older, I prize being content and happy far more than being cool.  I'll never be as cool as I was in my 20's, but that's okay.  I've impressed myself enough.  I've inflated my own ego as much as I could.  And as my ego deflates, it propels me into the future.

Are you cool, man?